


The Spectacle Superimposition

by allhaildiscordia



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crack, F/M, Gen, Nobel Prize, Other, The Author Regrets Nothing, shamy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:02:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22132231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allhaildiscordia/pseuds/allhaildiscordia
Summary: Sheldon's got glasses. One-shot. Crack.
Relationships: Leonard Hofstadter/Penny, Sheldon Cooper/Amy Farrah Fowler
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	The Spectacle Superimposition

**Author's Note:**

> Things happen when I'm depressed. This time, I have written a crackfic.
> 
> I just need to get this out of my head. And I am totally crushing on glasses-wearing Jim Parsons right now. And that's the reason why this fic happened.
> 
> As I said, this is crack, so I exagerated the plot. I'm not sure whether it turned out good, but my depression-addled brain told me it's good enough to post. I'll just have a panic attack later. May, or may not edit it later.
> 
> Unbeta-ed. Please pardon grammatical errors and all. Characters are not mine, just the story. Any similarities to real life are not intentional.
> 
> Also, anybody can hook me up on a Shamy fic where Amy has been musing over Sheldon's death? Over the course of the fic, Sheldon wears glasses because his eyesight's getting bad. Please comment if you know where I can find that fic. Thanks in advance.

*

"Hello, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler-Cooper."

"Hello, Sheldon."

Then he heard the blob of colors giggle shyly.

 _His beautiful blob of colors._ As much as the sound of her laugh sends waves of happiness and longing in his heart, he can't help but be annoyed by the fact that he can't see his wife clearly on the monitor of his laptop.

Given that he can't do anything about his situation at the moment, he made a mental note for himself, and trudged on with the conversation.

"How was your day, my beautiful vixen? Are you enjoying your stay in London?", Sheldon inquired.

"Very much. It's been so long since I have attended a neurobiology conference, ever since we won the Nobel. I missed going back to my original area of expertise. The topics discussed are pretty interesting. There is this one speaker who has presented about how the bacterium Porphyromonas gingivalis, which causes chronic gum disease, may play a role in driving the development of Alzheimer's disease", Amy enthusiastically replied.

Sheldon's face is scrunched up in a way that Amy usually associates to annoyance. She would be annoyed if only she didn't know his husband fairly well.

"Sheldon, is there something that's bothering you?", a tone of concern coloring her voice.

"Oh. I'm sorry, Amy. There's something I can't put out of my mind as of the moment...hmm...You know, it's unfair of me to continue this conversation if I am not able to provide it in my usual stimulating fashion. Will it be ok if I Skype you again same time tomorrow?"

"Is it about work? Are you ok?", a pause, "Do you need me to come home early?"

"No...no Amy. I'm fine. Nothing to cause alarm and/or concern. Just a small mishap on my part. I'm sure I can find a remedy as I run through my errands today, Then, I will be able to talk to you again in my usual engaging manner. I will call you again tomorrow. Goodbye."

"Goodbye Sheldon. I love you."

"I love you too. Bye-bye."

Sheldon cuts the call with a sigh. 

He's been putting this aside for far too long. It's time to do something about it.

*

Howard and Raj are on their way to the cafeteria when they overheard a group of pretty graduate students passing by.

_"God, who knew he looked so hot wearing glasses? If I can just make out with him here and there..."_

_"Makes you forget he's kind of crazy....But maybe he's also crazy in bed"._

That statement was followed by collective giggles.

_"Probably. Now we know why his wife seems to be so madly in love with him..."_

_"Makes me want to ambush and lock myself in a room with him or something..."_

_"God I'm a sucker for weird, innocent-looking guys. With big, baby-blue eyes."_

More giggles followed.

_"Isn't he some kind of a celebrity?"_

Howard elbows Raj gently, "Seems like there's somebody new in the university. Apparently, he's famous, and girls are fawning over him".

"And by their description, he seems kind of dreamy. I'm excited to see who he is", Raj replied.

"Never thought you have a thing for blue-eyed, innocent-looking guys", Howard teased.

"Oh please...have you seen Zac Efron? He's my definition of dreamy..."

Howard rolled his eyes on that comment.

*

"Um, Dr. Cooper?"

A pretty redhead with beautiful olive eyes approached their table, bringing a cup of what seems to be pudding from the cafeteria. A sigh escaped Leonard's chest. She's the tenth person to approach their table. And they're only just fifteen minutes into lunch.

There seems to be a shortage of desserts in the cafeteria section, while their table currently has an abundance of it.

Sitting beside Leonard, a tall, lanky man wearing thick, black-rimmed glasses has looked up towards the pretty redhead.

"Yes? Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Um..., ah yes...", the girl stammered, "I'm Olive, I'm a grad student here, and I was just wondering if...if...you would like some pudding to go with your lunch?"

"And why would I?", Sheldon innocently asked, his blue eyes looking at the pretty redhead.

The blush spreading across the redhead's face almost rivaled the color of her hair.

"I...I..."

"Sheldon, be nice", he exasperatedly told his best friend.

"But, we already have food. And nine other graduate students have already given us dessert. We already have too much, and as you know, too much intake of foods high in sugar..."

"Sheldon!", Leonard said as if barking an order.

Sheldon's hand instantly flew to accept the pudding, "Yes please, thank you."

His long, pale fingers brushed the pretty redhead's hand, and Olive can't help but let out a silent squeal.

She hurriedly returned to her table with her equally gorgeous friends, absolute delight on her face.

"He touched me! Oh my God, I'm so not washing this hand again..."

Leonard can't help but shake his head.

"Are you ok, Leonard? Is there anything that's bothering you?"

Typical of his clueless friend. "It's nothing Sheldon", a small smile, "just continue eating."

"Does it have something to do with the desserts we've been getting today? If you want them so badly, I don't mind sharing. I only want the cobbler given to me by that guy named Andrew..."

"No it's fine. You can share it with Howard and Raj...Raj would like the pudding cup..."

"Well, come to think of it, for starters, you have lactose intolerance, and almost all of these desserts have milk on them, I think the danish is safe..."

"Oh, good afternoon gentlemen." Howard mocked bowed.

"You look particularly irritated today, Leonard. Have you met a confounding variable in your experiment?", Howard teased as he took his seat with his tray of food across Leonard's.

Sheldon laughed breathily on Howard's comment.

Leonard then heard few giggles from the table at their back.

 _"He's so cute when he laughs"_ , a distant woman said melodiously.

Leonard rolled his eyes.

Raj settled his tray on the table and took his seat across Sheldon's, his eyes on the desserts laid across the table.

"Ohh why are there so many desserts? Anybody having PMS? I'm a bit weepy these past few days, so I'm calling dibs on the pudding..."

"Suit yourself, just don't touch the cobbler", Sheldon replied.

"The only thing confounding in my day is this weird guy sitting beside me. Otherwise, I'm fine", Leonard said nonchalantly while pointing his fork to Sheldon.

That's when Howard noticed for the first time that Sheldon is wearing glasses.

"Oi Sheldon, what's with the glasses? Are you "twinning" with Leonard now?", Howard teased.

"Oh come on, Howard", Sheldon replied, "I am not, by any means, emulating Leonard's sense of style, if that's what you are implying. I just had a dilemma yesterday when I was talking to Amy via Skype. I was not able to see her clearly, and to be honest, I wasn't been able to see anything clearly for the past five weeks, five days, and twelve hours. So I have come to a conclusion that a solution needs to be in order, so I went to an ophthalmologist yesterday to get a pair of prescription glasses."

And "twinning" isn't even a proper word", Sheldon quickly added.

Howard stared at Sheldon for a few seconds, then exclaimed as an epiphany came to him, "So that's the reason why you sucked at Halo and WoW these past few weeks!", then reverted his attention back to Leonard, "Told you Leonard, he really is going blind!"

"Howard, I'm not going blind, It's just myopia, also called nearsightedness. It occurs to up to 30-40 percent of adults in United States and Europe, so it's not that uncommon. Now that I have procured eyeglasses, I can now, quote-unquote, "go back to kicking your buttocks" at Halo and WoW."

"Yeah, you wish. Hey Raj, where did you get that pudding cup, I also want one for dessert..."

Howard stopped when he noticed Raj staring at Sheldon, mouth agape while still holding the pudding cup.

"Oi Raj wake up!", Howard barked.

"Oh. Hi guys. What are we talking about again?", Raj suddenly replied, his eyes still glossy and out of focus.

"They are making a big fuss over my necessity to procure spectacles, while you are gawking at me like how my ophthalmologist has been gawking at me yesterday while I was trying for some glasses. She's a nice lady, but she keeps on asking whether I'm single, or if I'm free to join her for dinner. I can't see why she can't have her dinner alone", Sheldon replied.

Leonard snorts at Sheldon's statement. Howard stared at Sheldon, disbelief on his face.

"Uh huh", Raj replied, staring absentmindedly again at Sheldon, "You said you like cobbler, Dr. Cooper? I'll buy you some more..."

 _What the frak?_ "Earth to Raj! Earth to Raj!", Howard said while waving his hands in front of Raj's face.

Howard was interrupted when a beautiful blond girl with hazel eyes approached their table, holding something that seems like a slice of apple pie.

"Ah, bonjour, mademoiselle...", Howard automatically greeted.

The blond girl's face crumpled up with distaste for a moment, then quickly reverted her attention to Sheldon, "Dr. Cooper?"

Leonard sighs exasperatedly.

Here we go again.

*

As much as President Siebert has "prostituted" him in one of the University fundraisers party in the past "in the name of science", he can't understand why he is telling him to push Sheldon to also "take one for the team" this year. He had banned Sheldon from attending the party in past _for god's sake._

Yes, he understood that Sheldon has caught the eye of Mrs. Braunstein (a long-time university donor who owns a conglomerate) as they are on their way to their offices from the cafeteria, and she has been looking forward to meeting him again. And yes, he himself is not that shabby, as Mrs. Latham has also expressed interest in meeting him again this year.

But, _is Siebert going mad?_ He and Sheldon are already married. He is happily and loyally married to Penny, and he wouldn't trade it with the world. And Sheldon's marriage to Amy is already a known fact, given that they had accepted their Nobel Prize for Physics side by side with each other.

And also Sheldon is, well, Sheldon. That alone should already be a cause for concern.

He can't help but suspect that President Siebert is taking advantage of the opportunity to have Sheldon "entertain" a "lonely widow" while Dr. Fowler-Cooper is away to attend a neurobiology conference in London.

Apparently, even Nobel Prize laureates are not immune to being "prostituted" by the higher institution in which they are currently employed, all "for the name of science".

As much as he wanted more funds to get additional equipment for his laboratory, he isn't thrilled to put their marriages on the line.

_Damn Sheldon and his new "glasses"._

"I don't get it. Why is President Siebert requiring me to come to this year's University fundraiser party? I thought he has already banned me from attending any future University fundraising parties. Why the sudden change of heart?", Sheldon complained while they are inside the elevator on their way to the fourth floor of the apartment building.

"Apparently, Mrs. Braunstein wants to see you again. And President Siebert is wondering if you can accompany her to the party", Leonard tried to clue his best friend in.

"And why is that? I believe Mrs. Braunstein is perfectly capable of attending the party on her own", Sheldon replied.

Leonard replied with an eye-roll, accompanied with a sigh. "Aren't you calling Amy about the fundraiser party so she can accompany you?"

_Better lay that idea down as a precaution. Thank me later._

"Oh, unlike Mrs. Braunstein, I am perfectly capable of attending the party on my own, even though I am repulsed by the idea of my person attending the said party. You and Penny are also accompanying me to the party, so I don't think it's necessary to ask Amy. She's enjoying her attendance to the neurobiology conference, I don't want to spoil her fun..."

As soon as the elevator door opens, they are greeted by Penny carrying a laundry basket, on her way to entering Apartment 4A.

"Oh Honey...welcome home, how's work?", Penny greeted Leonard with a kiss on his cheek.

"It's fine. Oh, remember what I told you about the University fundraising party? It's three days from now..."

"Yep Leonard, don't worry. I won't let Mrs. Latham have a piece of you", Penny mischievously smiled, then gave him with a quick peck on the lips.

Penny then turned her attention to Sheldon who is currently opening his apartment door, his back facing them, "Oh, hey Sheldon, sweetie, you're also coming to the fundraiser party?"

"Sadly, I am. President Siebert told me that as a Nobel laureate, I am required to attend the party", Sheldon replied with his back still facing Penny and Leonard, then he turned to face them.

All of a sudden, Sheldon's delectably-framed baby blue eyes proceeds to stare at her like it's been staring right through her soul, and she swore her heart has skipped a beat or two.

_Holy guacamole. Is this really Sheldon? When did he become...for the lack of better word...hot?_

"Hi, Penny", Sheldon greeted her. _Is his voice always this melodious?_

"Penny's cooking dinner tonight, you can join us if you want", Leonard's voice sliced the thick air, totally oblivious to Sheldon's effect on Penny.

"I'll be cooking spaghetti with little cut-up hotdogs on it!", Penny suddenly spluttered. _Am I now?_

"Oh goody!", Sheldon said excitedly, his laugh sounds like bells in Penny's ear, "I'll just call Amy tonight, then I will be joining you two for dinner later."

"Looking forward to having you for dinner, sweetie..."

Sheldon sent a lopsided smile on her way before closing his apartment door. Penny felt like her heart has dropped to her stomach before returning back to her chest.

_I think I'll be having a heart attack right now. That's one tall glass of water right there._

Who would've thought Dr. Whackadoodle looked hot wearing glasses? It's just like Clark Kent and Superman, only in reverse.

_Oh Amy, you lucky girl._

*

"Hello, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler-Cooper."

Sheldon is ecstatic that he can now see his beautiful wife clearly on his laptop monitor. Clearly, procuring a pair of glasses was a wise decision.

But the warm feeling spreading across his chest was suddenly changed to worry as he noticed Amy just staring at him on the screen, her mouth agape.

She's so entranced by his husband's baby blue eyes, framed by black, thick-rimmed glasses, looking deep into her being.

_God, is he always this sexy?_

"Hooo..."

"Who? What? Are you ok, Amy?"

The worried tone in her husband's voice broke Amy's reverie.

"Oh hi Sheldon. Sorry, I was just..."in the zone". When did you bought your glasses?", Amy replied, eyes still a bit glassy.

A knowing smile followed by a breathy laugh. "I love you too, Amy. I purchased this pair of glasses yesterday, because I was so distressed not seeing you clearly in the monitor. According to my ophthalmologist, I have myopia, which can easily be remedied by procuring appropriate spectacles. Also, what's the use of 4k resolution if I'm not able to see every pixel of you clearly in it? I must say, I never thought I'll miss seeing your nose hairs clearly again."

Amy mock pouted. Sheldon laughed again.

"Though I can't help but find similarity on the way you look at me compared to the way my ophthalmologist looked at me yesterday. Though she keeps on asking me whether I'm single, which I didn't answer because I don't see how it is relevant to me acquiring prescription glasses. She then asked me to accompany her for dinner, for which I respectfully declined because I think she is perfectly capable of having a dinner all by herself. She then scheduled me for a follow up check-up..."

_Excuse me?_

"When's your follow up checkup?", Amy harshly interrupted.

"Tuesday next week", Sheldon replied.

"I will be back to Pasadena by then. I'll be accompanying you. There's no way in hell you can go back to your ophthalmologist without me accompanying you", Amy said.

"I don't think you need to worry about it. Even Raj looks at me the same way, it's not a big deal."

 _Oh Lord, even Raj._ "This is non-negotiable", Amy answered firmly before Sheldon can further protest.

"Yes, ma'am", Sheldon answered. 

Short silence then followed.

"It seems like I made you upset, although I don't know the reason why. I'm sorry", he apologized, trying to placate his wife.

"No Sheldon, there's nothing to apologize for. I just missed you so much, that's all", Amy replied, guilty for her earlier outburst.

"The two statements don't exactly correlate, but I'll let it pass. I miss you too my little vixen."

Amy giggled through the monitor screen.

"How was your day Sheldon?"

"The most peculiar thing Amy. There seems to be an increase on the number of graduate students approaching me to either ask for help with their thesis and/or dissertation, and/or send their adulations on my previous works, and on my winning the Nobel. There also seems to be an increase in the number of people sending us desserts at lunch. I particularly liked the cobbler sent by a student named Andrew, although he's a bit touchy for my own liking. Raj enjoyed the pudding cup, which was sent by a redhead named Olive, whom, in Leonard's opinion, was a beautiful young lady. Don't worry Amy, I have already told Leonard that he should practice self-control, as he's already a married man..."

Sheldon continued to rattle on, but Amy's not listening anymore. _What the hell is happening?_ She was away for just three days, then all of a sudden, graduate students are throwing themselves wantonly at her husband?

_Damn her clueless, hot husband. Damn those glasses that made him look hotter!_

"Also, President Siebert is requiring my presence at the University fundraiser party, the very same party he has banned me from attending years ago. Apparently, once you won the Nobel, you are now required to attend that humdrum of a party", Sheldon prattled on.

"University fundraiser party?" Amy interrupted. "Isn't that party the university's way of hooking up the faculty with prospective benefactors in exchange for funds and grants?"

Sheldon adoringly stared at her while thinking, breathily laughed, then continued, "That does pretty much sums it up, albeit you make it sound like the university participates in human trafficking".

Amy suddenly had a sick realization. "Why does he require you to attend the party after banning you for so long?"

Sheldon shrugged his shoulders. "President Siebert told me that Mrs. Braunstein, a long-time benefactor of the university, has requested for me to accompany her to the party. Leonard and I had met her while she was on her way to the President's office. We exchanged few pleasantries before they let us be on our way to our offices. She’s an exceptional lady, although I can't comprehend her need for someone to accompany her to the party. She seems to be perfectly able to attend it herself."

_Oh Siebert, you sick bastard. Taking advantage of the situation..._

"When's the party, Sheldon?", Amy asked Sheldon in her mock sweet voice.

"On Saturday. It's three days from now."

"Ok, I'm booking a flight now. I will be there on Friday", Amy said after opening a new window on her computer to check on available flights going back to California.

"Amy, there's no need to worry. I know you are enjoying the neurobiology conference you are currently attending. Besides, Leonard and Penny will accompany me to the party, I don't think there's anything that should be a cause for such a concern..."

"Nope", Amy said the word with extra pop on 'p', eerily similar to Penny's way of speaking, "I'll be coming home as soon as possible, and I'll be accompanying you to the party, if President Siebert so much insists that you attend to one. Again, this is non-negotiable."

Sheldon sighed. 

"Very well. I'll happily await for your return. Oh, tonight I'll be going to Leonard's for dinner. Penny's making spaghetti with hotdogs...", Sheldon continued to rattle on.

*

Penny's been busy cooking dinner when she saw Amy calling through her cellphone.

"Hello, Ames, what's up?"

"Please tell Leonard to always keep an eye on Sheldon until I come back.", Amy replied, bitter bile on her voice.

"I miss you too, Ames. May I ask why?"

"I have talked to Sheldon earlier, and apparently women, and men, are now throwing themselves left and right at him. I can't make him take off those damn glasses, and apparently he's scared of using contacts, so I need Leonard to watch him extra carefully until I come back."

"Oh, glasses..."

Penny suddenly remembered how hot Sheldon is when she met him earlier. Pretty blue eyes that bore through her soul. Dark, thick-rimmed glasses...

"Bestie...Bestie? Are you there?"

_Oh god she badly needs a drink. Keep yourself together. It's Sheldon for god's sake!_

"Oh, sorry Ames, I'm cooking. What are you saying earlier?"

"Sheldon has caught a university benefactor's attention and she wants to get her way with him at the coming fundraisers' party! I don't know what witchcraft Sheldon's glasses have, but I, as I have said so in the past, have been smacking that ketchup bottle for a long time. All she had to do is tip it over and point it at her fries!"

"Oh come on, Amy, it's Sheldon. Nothing is gonna happen."

 _"He might be a walking "sex on a stick" now, but he's still a whackadoodle"_ , Penny told herself.

"That's what you said to me when I started dating him. And then seven years later, bingo-bango, something happened!"

*


End file.
